Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Not my finest hour.

Sigh. I fall a lot. It’s not the alcohol or the drugs. I just fall. And I always have. I have weak ankles, I know this. I found this out when all my ballerina dreams were dashed because I couldn’t go on pointe. I had waited for 10 years and then I just couldn’t do it. I tried and tried, I did strengthening exercise and therapy and I still couldn’t. But by then it didn’t matter. Not only was I aware that my ankles were weak…they were too.

I take a spill about once a year or so. Oh, sometimes I go for years without one but you know, on average it’s about once a year and generally when I am on my way to some even that requires the use of ankles…a bowling party, the renaissance faire, stuff like that. Things that need walking and standing abilities. But, having taken the fall so many times, I am generally not fazed by it. Keeping in motion can keep the swelling down and when you have been told by a sports therapist that “oh my god your ligaments and tendons don’t even seem to be attached to anything anymore how the hell does your foot stay on?”, then, you know, you get used to it.

So on my way to the grocery store for lunch today I stepped on a rock. I think I stepped on a rock. It could have been the ghost of a rock, or a penny…maybe a ladybug carcass…it really doesn’t take much. I took the fall with my usual modicum of grace, which is to say, none at all and landed on my hands and knees. A few cars slowed down, I suspect to laugh at me, but I just kind of caught my breath, there on my hands and knees, for a second, gathered my scattered wits and got up. I hobbled back to the office, got in my car and went to the store, bought a wrap and some sushi and drove back to work.

And to think, I wanted to be a ballerina. Clearly, the weak ankles aren’t the only thing that kept me from that dream.

3 comments:

Alicat said...

lol okay without being really mean -- this post is hilarious and written very well. great job. second -- i totally feel you. I am the same exact way. :)

Jodi said...

I'm just glad you are okay. And like I said on the phone...at least you have a reason that you fall!

Brenda Griffith said...

I have a pair of Nine West slip on sandals that I was wearing a lot earlier this summer. By about the fifth time my ankle went left (or right--whichever way was "out") while my foot went forward I gave up on them. First there is the sharp pain in the ankle itself--you know you tore something that was not meant to tear. Then there are the scraped hands and knees and maybe ripped clothes. Finally there is the sheer shock of finding yourself unexpectedly breathless and on the ground followed quickly by the hot embarassment of having been seen sprawling gracelessly. *Sigh* and I had no problem getting up on pointe.